Wilson Familiy Reunion

Yesterday Jordan and I made an appearance at my maternal grandma's family reunion. Growing up in Alaska, I hardly ever went to any family reunions, although I attended this one about 10 years ago when I was 14. It was so fun! I'm so lucky to be related to such great, faithful people. Jordan and I had a lot of fun looking at my family tree and trying to see if we're distantly related (I know that seems weird, but it seems like it would be weird if we WEREN'T related in some distant way. Both families are old Mormon pioneer families who settled in the Ogden area...).

There's a lot of people who I had heard of, who I may have met once or twice, that I'd seen pictures of that I got to talk to, which I really enjoyed. One of my favorite moments was when my Grandma and her sisters were talking about their father, who died when my Grandma was just 6 years old. They were all very young when their father passed away, but their memories were precious and sweet, and reminded me how I feel and remember my own late father. They talked about how even though they were very small (7 years and younger), they remembered him playing with them, and killing snakes to protect them when they were outside. It was these simple memories that they clung to and remembered how much their father loved them, even though he left this world when they were so young. Mostly, I was just struck about what an effect a man could have on their lives to be remembered so many years later.

I found myself contemplating Fatherhood. Who would my own father, who died 12 years ago, be to my child? I hope I can describe the incalculable love I felt from him, and how both his life and his death shaped my life. I also hope that I can express how sometimes really hard, inexplicable things happen, but you can be happy. As I grew up, Heavenly Father sent other men into my life who helped me and loved me, even though my own father couldn't be there. I guess more than anything I want to be able to express to my children that I don't feel I was handicapped by his absence, but ultimately I am happier because of it. And that Heavenly Father will always take care of us and fulfill our needs when we have faith.

Jordan is such a good father, already. I know we aren't yet holding our baby in our arms, but I am continually impressed with his commitment to our livelihood and safety. I can sense his excitement, and that brings me such joy. I am lucky that he married me, and that we can have such a beautiful life together. And I can't wait to meet this little baby!