Hiking in Denali (Part II)

The first time Jordan and I went hiking in Denali, I was completely infatuated with him and desperately trying to get him to like me.  I was headed into my Junior year of high school, and Jordan was headed for BYU in just a few days.  I was sad at the prospect of him leaving college, but even sadder at the thought that he wouldn't even miss me.  Over the course of the summer, we had become email buddies, exchanging letter once every few days, talking about a variety of topics, although love was never one of them (I wasn't brazen enough to just come out and tell him "I'm totally in love with you!"), and, oh yeah, he had a girl friend.  But before he headed to BYU, I somehow convinced him to go hiking in Denali with me.  Frankly, the fact that he even agreed to drive 2 hours to a hiking location with me days before leaving for college demonstrates the value of our friendship to him, although I was too caught up in the fact that he didn't love me to appreciate it.

This is a fantastic picture of where we went hiking.  We started by climbing that rock formation there at the bottom of the picture (the hike I always went on), and then Jordan said, "why don't we climb this next one!" that mountain to the right of the picture.  I, ever the eager-pleaser, agreed, and it about killed me and my way out of shape butt.  Jordan spent the entire time using his new, cool GPS he won in a mathematics competition in school, and I spent the whole time wishing he was as into me as he was into the GPS. But alas, we climbed, we had fun, we went back down as friends.  Jordan left a couple of days later, and we spent the next few years writing emails back and forth, as friends.

Almost exactly three years later, we decided to go hiking again.  Things were different.  We had spent the last three years as friends, emailing regularly about our lives.  We were both single and working in Fairbanks for the summer, and neither of us knew what that meant.  I had been telling myself for months now that I didn't have feelings for Jordan anymore.  And honestly, I still don't know what Jordan was thinking for the majority of that summer.  Anyway, 5 days before I was to head back to Texas for college, I told Jordan I wanted to go hiking in Denali.  He agreed.  After climbing the first rock formation, I realized we had forgotten a flashlight and Jordan volunteered to run back to the car before we conquered the second peak. As he ran down, I told him, "Don't get hurt!" and he replied, "Anything for you!" and all I could think of was the Princess Bride and how when Wesley says "As you wish" he really means "I love you" and oh my goodness, Jordan loves me! He came back, we hiked up to the second  peak, and as we sat there in punctuated conversation, looking at the spectacular view, everything came spilling all out. We loved each other.  We wanted to be together.  There were a lot of things said, half I can't remember because it was such an insane, heady experience, but I walked away knowing we were going to be married, that this was indeed the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.  

One more time, nearly 3 years later, we found ourselves hiking once again. We didn't climb with secret crushes, but with our relationship well established and consistent.  I was finished with college and working in Fairbanks, and Jordan had returned from his mission in Mongolia just 3 months earlier.  We had spent every single day together (something, that up to that point, we had never been able to do).  It was May 31, 2008, and although Jordan didn't know, it was exactly 10 years since my father had died.  We followed the same path: up the first peak, and then up the second.  There at the top, we tried to find the exact spot where we had started our relationship almost 3 years earlier.  Instead of silence and anticipation, there was easy conversation and laughter.  And then he got on one knee and asked me to marry him.  We stayed on top of that mountain, talking about our futures and where we would go and what we wanted our lives to be like.  

We haven't been back since, mostly because our lives are so busy.  College, then a baby, then a job, then a move, then another baby and here we are.  But I love that it seems everything for us came back to a beautiful hike in one of the most beautiful places in the world.  And you know, hiking is so much like marriage.  Sometimes it's steep, and it's so hard and you don't know if you can keep going, and sometime the views are so breathtakingly beautiful you try to remember every detail of the moment so you can always go back there.  You spend most of the time helping each other.  When one wants to quit, the other is there to tell them to keep going, because it's all going to be worth it. And it has been worth it.  Every moment I have been with Jordan has been worth it.